Episode Review: Bachelorette, Season Andi, Episode 9

View my opinions on all the previous episodes. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8 as well as that filler episode.

Final 3 in the Dominican Republic.

If you feel like you need to pause watching to make food or clean or something just know you are probably pretty safe skipping through the first segment and starting after the commercial break. It is basically her crying, her talking about her uncertainty, and a recap of her relationship with the men.

First Date: Nick

She is worried because his version of his past relationships and his family’s version are different. He wants to tell her he loves her. I just want her dress. They really should publish the clothing list for shows so that I can get all the pretty things.

Andi says “It’s kind of an adult romance with Nick.” She feels that he is really passionate. I’m just like, waaaaaat?

She tries to pry his relationship history from him. He rambles (and he knows he did). And at the end I just don’t feel any emotion from him. But are we shocked that he is reticent and a little (lot) awkward in this dating situation? I would be gone the first night for lightly punching the Bachelor in the arm, referencing South Park, and calling him dude all while laughing nervously.

Nick did “what any 33yo from the Midwest would do.” He wrote a fairytale with pictures and everything. This is too much. It’s past cheesy. It has extra blank pages at the end for their future. And it sets him up perfectly to say, “I love you.” But he doesn’t. It’s like his timing just fell apart. He has to actively create the moment. I can’t decide whether he is awkwardly endearing or just a douche. Continue reading

End Thoughts on the Wold Cup 2014

Some of you might be like, “Prisma, you never gave any previous thoughts on the WC. What makes you think I want to read about it now that it is over?” I missed the opportunity to cover each game because of my real world job. But I do love making all-encompassing statements. So here is the one I will apply to this WC.

This was the cup of keepers. Granted, this WC almost broke the record for highest scoring tournament in WC history. But when you look back at the stats I am blown away by the keepers.

Here’s how the Man of the Match breaks down for all position but keepers. (A “w” indicates that the winning player’s team won the game. A “t” indicates that the winning player’s team tied the game. A “l” indicates that the winning player’s team lost the game.) Continue reading

Episode Review: Bachelorette, Season Andi, Episode 8

We are getting close to the end people! Look back through my eyes at Episodes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7 (also the filler episode if you are that bored).

For those of you who are looking for answers not given in the episode look elsewhere. All I can offer you is the best darn color commentary anywhere on the internets (valid opinion of my friend Catsy that definitely counts as a reliable source).

It’s hometowns! This is the time where we can see if we, I mean she, would fit well with the final four contestants’ families.

Nick’s Hometown: On their tour around Milwaukee they hit up a brewery where there is a beer on tap called the “Nick and Andi” and then they polka (which I am much better at than they are) and that’s the story of how I warmed back up to Nick.

His family is large, ten siblings. She and Nick get to sit on one couch and the entire brood plus significant others minus one brother sit/stand across and fire questions.

I’m so hot and cold with this man. Sometimes I really hate him. Other times I think he is just adorkable. And that’s probably due to skilled and experienced editors. Continue reading

Episode Review: Bachelorette, Season Andi, Episode 7

Take a quick stroll from first impression until hometown rose through my eyes. Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3, Episode 4, Look Back Episode, Episode 5, and Episode 6.

Tonight we got to Belgium which was brilliantly (and disastrously) chosen after they slayed out national team today. Good job whoever is in charge of picking locations and planning episode air dates.

Marcus 1-on-1: Remember that Marcus told her he wanted to leave at one point? It isn’t because he doesn’t like her. It’s because he is scared of the power of his own emotions. (Gag) This is the date I would like to go on. If their first 1-on-1 was my least favorite situation walking around eating good not scary/bug based/eye retaining food and getting to sit frequently is my favorite.

It doesn’t look like they touch their wine that much. Marcus is often seen holding his water-glass. They really took their discussion seriously. At the end he throws out the word “soul mate” in an aside.

Nick decides that he isn’t hated enough by the guys he has to live with and goes to find Andi. He goes into the hotel Andi is staying at, tells a terrible lie that he lost his room key, forget the room number, but it is under his wife’s name and could they help him out. And they gave him the key. I’m quite sure that part had to be staged because this is not the first time a contestant has snuck out and tracked down their target. But let’s remember friend, the last two times this has happened the contestant has ended up going home at the very end heartbroken and bitter (Arie and the hairstylist lady). It does not work for some reason. Continue reading

Movie Review: 22 Jump Street (2014)

I think I forgot what was funny until I saw this movie. I laughed more at the ending credits than I did for the entirety of A Million Ways to Die in the West and Neighbors. Not only is this movie the funniest thing I have seen in quite some time but it also manages to blow the first one out of the water.

I don’t know if the writers are in their prime or if the actors felt unstoppable but I doubt anything as funny will be coming out anytime soon. The trailer was mildly humourous but it didn’t even come close to brilliance of this movie.

All the talent was utilized brilliantly. Of course, not everyone can be a main character but they made sure that everyone worth hearing from got to shine a little.

The humor was far more palatable for my poor sensibilities as well. There was very little potty humor and the sex jokes were as tasteful as sex jokes in a movie aimed at guys can be. Not once did I find myself trying to ignore a scene or pretending that I was completely cool with something happening.

There was an attempt at a larger theme but unlike other movies that have attempted a deeper meaning it actually delivered the message with a subtle hand. It didn’t throw it in our faces in the beginning, it didn’t forget about it in the middle, and it didn’t rush to conclude at the end. Continue reading